My walking partners would start walking at 8:30 pm at a park 20 minutes away. My goal to get into bed is 9:00 - 9:30 pm. Wouldn't happen with the late evening walking and that would set me back the next day.
My early morning appointment with my running partner fit my schedule perfectly but I'm not ready to run. Furthermore, my partner was at a higher fitness level than me which made me feel a little guilty about having to stop frequently to walk and suck air. So, I had to face reality. I do want to run but right now I have to start with a plan like Couch-to-5k.
This past weekend, my email buddy realized that our weekly communication was not working for her. While I enjoyed our email conversations, I completely understand where she's coming from. It's an evolving journey and you try new approaches hoping they will work but you also have to be realistic when they've run their course.
I'm ready to move forward alone but definitely still open to the idea that I can share my weight loss journey with someone else.
All of that being said, I still wanted to share the post below because the main thought is still a valid one and truthfully, the question my (now former) email buddy asked of me started me on the path of cleaning out my fitness house.
Hope you enjoy!
- Kareen, RD
p.s. I still consider myself blessed for the experiences I am having!
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On Accountability
The other day my Facebook status read "I am building a regime of accountability partners." (if you haven't friended me on FB yet. . . you should!)
I've been fortunate to have found like-minded people with whom I can share this all too frustrating journey. Local to inter-continental, I have found a walking group and a running partner. These local-ites are great and I enjoy spending time with them.
I have also been blessed with a correspondance accountability partner. We only met in person once and hit it off. We've been emailing each other weekly since June. She's honest about her journey and I find it completely refreshing. I feel 100% comfortable not only sharing with her that I ate poorly but also the horrible deets also. Even if that means admitting to a pizza binge (*blushing* it's true). In addition to her honesty, she's insightful.
So, it was no surprise when I found this gem of a response to my weekly check-in this week:
"Question: How do you feel about yourself right now? How about the the last few days, weeks or months? Will thoughts, if not great, change once you achieve your ultimate weight loss goal? Will they be lasting thoughts or fleeting based on what the scale reads or after only 2 slices of pizza? You may, as I am, wish to consider making that a primary goal of which to investigate. This (or whatever is not working as you would have it work, however have yet to identify) could be the bigger issue and the weight, residual. Reading, and other connections, are leading me to believe that the weight/health issue is a close second, but not the issue. I am working on making that connection for myself and through it, will allow my self to eventually conquer my own sabotage. This sort of self-examination requires more than than the band aide solution of celebrating 3lbs of water weight...let's dig a little deeper."(she kindly gave me the okay to reprint. )
While this question has hounded me in my head, I've never seen it on paper and it's certainly never been asked of me. It was a powerful moment and I'm still processing a response. But I know whatever the answer, I can be honest and say that it's not only affecting my weight loss efforts but other areas in my life as well.
So, I now ask you the same question: What's the primary issue seeping into your life and sabotaging your efforts to be the best you?
Keep pushing!
- Kareen, RD
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